Good Enough Parenting

A Schema Prevention Parenting Programme by John & Karen Louis using Movie Therapy.

It contain 8 workshop, cover 8 different CORE NEEDS.

Yesterday (May 8)

1. Simple Parenting Matters
2. Perants involvement in their children Matters
3. We cannot raise our children by proxy
4. and not all children are the same...
5. With the help of multimedia and group exercises, we iwll explore three Lifetraps and how to meet one Core Need weekly.

Below is what i want to share:-
The parenting is not mean must be Perfect Parent but must be Good Enough Parent. And the good parenting must have a great Marriage. As a parent, we need to keep learn and it must be train- take life time to learn. When our marriage fall apart it affect our kid school work. So the relationship between husband and wife must be good. And we alway ask:
'Why do i behave the way i do' 'Why do my childred behave the way they do'

When a child's Core Needs are not met, combines w his/her TEMPERAMENT and environment, 'Lifetraps' will develop.

Movie - 'Click'
I havenot watch this movie before, but it worth to watch. It abt a husband and a family, how the husband treat a work, relationship, family... the end of his life is he lost what his main aim.

Remember Family alway go 1st:
1. Great Marriage
2. Parenting
3. Others

Core Needs:
1. Basic Safety
2. Stable Base & Predictability
3. Guidance & Protection
4. Love, Nurturing & Attention
5. Empathy
6. Validation of Feelings
7. Acceptance & Praise
8. Sprirituality

It cover 3 lifetrap this week:-

• Emotional Deprivation- when one's desire for a normal degree of emotional support is not adequately met by others. Absenceof attention, affection, warmth or companionship, undestanding, listenning, self-disclosure or mutual sharing of feeling fr others, strenght, dictection, or guidance fr others.
• Defectiveness - the feeling that one is defective, bad, unwanted, inferior, or invalid in impartant respects; or that one would be unloveble to significant others if exposed. May involve hypersensitivity to criticism, rejection, and blame; self-consciouness, comparisons, and insecurity ard others; or sense of shame regarding on's perceived flaws. These flaws may be private or public.
• Emotional Inhibition - the excessive inhibition of spontaneous action, feeling, or communicatin - usually to avoid disapproval by others, feelings of shame, or losing control of one's impulses.

The three coping style:

1. fight aka counter attack
2. fight aka escape, avoidance
3. fight aka surrender